Archive for November, 2011
We hear the other side’s words, but how well are we really listening?
November 29th, 2011 | 
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Over the last month or so, I’ve been struck by several situations in which one party to a conversation or discussion obviously was listening to what was being said, but it was equally obvious that the listener wasn’t really hearing what was being said. I have a couple of theories for why, but it’s often because somewhere early on in the exercise of hearing, the listening party stops listening and starts formulating his response in his mind. Once that happens, any chance of allowing what was heard to actually be thought about or to simmer in the listener’s mind for a few minutes or more is gone. Dead on arrival. What was heard was not at all processed and wasn’t thought about beyond what and how to respond.
This is even more true in online communications because we can’t observe the body language, hear the tone of voice or the speed of the words being spoken and the intonations of the speaker. If the majority of communications is non-verbal, the online listener, reduced to reader, is already at a huge disadvantage in his ability to really hear and understand what is being conveyed to him.
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Collaborative Law: High energy, out of the box legal creativity
The largest annual gathering of Collaborative lawyers and professionals just took place in San Francisco from October 27-30, as the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals (IACP) held its 12th annual Forum. As always, this Forum was an amazing event, four days of insightful, profound and transformative thought in the legal profession. The IACP‘s mission is “to transform the way conflict is resolved worldwide”. When 630 of its 4,500 members gathered at this year’s Forum, it was clear that this community walks the walk of transformative dispute resolution work.
I’ve practiced law for over 20 years and can say that by and large, lawyers are a fairly conservative, tradition-based group, steeped in and guided by precedent and procedure. What is inspiring and attractive about the Collaborative Law (CL) community – particularly those who attend an IACP Forum – is its clear exception to that general norm. CL attracts some of the most creative, progressive and out of the box thinkers from around the world. They are fully engaged in this mission of transforming not only the way we resolve disputes, but more importantly the way we think about and approach them.
